******
30-DAY NOTICE TO VACATE
To Mr. or Miss Baby Wagner:
You are hereby notified that you are in violation of the rules, regulations, rental agreement, and/or obligations or restrictions applicable to your tenancy of the premises commonly known as YOUR MOTHER'S UTERUS.
Pursuant to the provisions of your due date, you are hereby given an eviction notice and ordered to vacate the womb, on or before October 25, 2009.
The reasons for this notice are:
1) Numerous complaints about nightly disturbances.
2) Undue destruction to landlord's property (i.e. physical discomfort and stress to bladder, cervix, and abdominal structures), as well as potentially permanent alterations to landlord's facade (stretch marks).
3) Pilfering resources (blood, fluids, energy) from landlord without adequate repayment.
4) The term for which you rented the property is nearly over.
You are instructed to comply with your obligations and vacate the womb within 30 (thirty) days of service of this notice.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
6 comments:
Too funny and absolutely true! It's the home stretch - hooray!
I LOVE this! Do you mind if I use it for my pregnant friends and clients? Of course, I'll credit you...the creator (of the eviction and Mr. or Miss Wagner).
@Leha: You are more than welcome to use it...though I can't take much credit. All I did was Google templates for real eviction notices and adapt to my purposes :)
Oh, you made me laugh, G. Too true and too, too funny. You are almost there...hang in there and soon little Wag or Wagnette will be on the scene.
hysterical!
Well baby Miles cut it close! But he did comply with mama's eviction notice! LOL! So happy for you all!
Post a Comment